Chances: don't take them for granted
I believe we are given multiple chances in life. To restart, to reset, to fix, to alter things that you don't like or want to improve on. But given that, how would you use these chances? In the past, I used to put chances in the negative light and became very complacent on how I take that word into heart. I remember always telling myself "it's okay to make a mistake, I still have the chance to redeem myself or the situation". But by putting this in my head, I didn't realize I was already hurting myself and the people around me. Missed chances, wasted chances. So why do we take the "gift of chances" for granted? Is it because we think we can always have another shot at things? Do we think that everytime we pull the trigger, there will always be bullets of chances ready for set off? I guess this is why we should treat everyday like it's our last. Tomorrow is never promised... what if we never get another chance at something so great? Can you live with that?
Choices: it's all up to you
If there's one thing I learned from the first half of 2015 is that how you mold your life is all up to you. You can't blame other people for your decisions and how your life turned out to be. Oftentimes I would hear people blaming their past problems/issues/traumas for the negative actions they do, merely because it's their reaction to the bad things that happened to them. I am pertaining to my then-self who loved blaming all the people who hurt her in the past with how she became so selfish, insensitive, and crazy overprotective of herself. Oh you can't do that; you shouldn't be revengeful and spread negativity in this world just because someone slapped you with one. Easy to say but hard to do, I know. Once you get to realize that by being revengeful, you do not only waste your time & energy but you also let anger grow and slowly eat all the goodness inside you. Who would want to live a life like that? It's your choice to take mishaps in your life with a bitter and fearful heart or pick out the valuable lesson from it. It's your choice to let a breakdown get the best of you or turn it into a breakthrough. It's your choice how you allow your heart to keep breaking by dwelling in the past or fill the gaps with a bright and exciting promise of the future. It's your choice to keep scratching a wound or find a remedy. It's your choice to let a scar remind you of only the ugly things or focus on the fact that all things heal in time. There are two wolves who are always fighting. One is darkness and despair. The other is light and hope. The question is... which wolf wins?
The one you feed.
Changes: I'm ready
And this is the part where I update you guys (whoever reads my neglected blog huhu) about the major change in my life. After 4 years of being a freelance fashion stylist/writer, I finally decided to try a new career path. My editors and friends from the fashion industry have been asking me about this "are you sure?" "why don't you just continue writing and join an editorial team?" "Is this really what you want?" I let these questions flow inside my brain until I was finally ready and sure of my answers. I left for the US last year to fix my life plan but when I came back here, I got blinded by the comfortability of my lifestyle till I reached to the point that I felt everything was so... stagnant. I can't deal with it anymore. The feeling that I am craving for something different but I don't do anything to change things. This isn't about not being content, this is about self-growth. I need this in my life right now. It's actually really scary to change industries but if not now, when? When will I ever step out of my comfort zone and take risks? It's about damn time I give up my fears, my doubts, and mediocrity. It's time to turn the page, it's time for a new chapter. And I'm trusting God it's going to be a beautiful one.